The Dessert Diaries: Episode One

Yes, this is a health and fitness blog. Yes, I am about to write a post about all the desserts that I am constantly eating—wait, what? It’s true! Dessert can be a part of a healthy lifestyle! And I’m going to set out to prove it to you right now through one of my favorite organizational activities: making a list.

 In my almost-twenty-one years as a woman growing up in America, I have been privy to much of the [in my opinion harmful] ideology surrounding our modern diet culture. One of the big things I’ve noticed is that when we talk about diets or dieting or even changing our eating habits in a way that we don’t consider a “diet,” we tend to talk a lot about what we’re not eating. I have definitely been a big culprit of this myself. In the two weeks before prom my sophomore year of high school, I was on a strict no-carb diet [spoiler alert: I couldn’t stick to it and binged on a ton of snacks and junk food three days before it was over, probably rendering the whole thing moot]. Since I was so focused on what I couldn’t have, I obsessed over carbs, and spent even more time dreaming about dessert than I likely would have otherwise, which led to the aforementioned binge.

 Well, I’m tired of structuring my eating like that, in terms of what I cannot or should not consume. For me [and I imagine for many other fellow foodies out there], it just doesn’t work. I love to eat, and I love to have dessert, and I love to do those things in responsible amounts in conjunction with food choices all over the spectrum of healthy to unhealthy. The moral of the story is this: anything can be part of a healthy lifestyle in moderation—we should celebrate the things that we do eat and love to eat rather than commiserating about all those “off-limits” foods that we “can’t” have. Nothing is sustainable without enjoyment, I don’t think.

 So, in that spirit, here is a list of my top seven favorite desserts as of late! If anything, I hope this inspires you to let go of some of those restrictions and listen to your body—it will find the balance that you need through its own accord, if you let it. Trust me on this. In the past ten months, I have lost twenty-five pounds, and I eat dessert almost every day [in addition to salad, veggies, protein, and all kinds of other stuff that fuels my body!]. But seriously, I am the dessert queen, to put it entirely non-dramatically. It’s an obsession. It’s a religion. It’s a... list:

 *Narrowing my top dessert picks down to seven was SO hard [it was supposed to be five, but here we are], so I’ve amended the topic from desserts to frozen desserts. These are in no particular order of favoritism!

 1. Dairy Queen Vanilla Soft Serve Cone
Am I basic? Yes. Sue me. I am a vanilla soft serve purist, and Dairy Queen vanilla soft-serve is at the top of the list for me. Does better soft serve probably exist out there? Maybe in the world of gourmet food or something. Is it this cheap and delicious? Definitely not. Sometimes you just need to stick to the classics, and this is the ultimate classic.
Cost: $2.39 for a medium
Calories: 330 for a medium

 2. Chipwich
You honestly cannot beat a good chocolate chip cookie and vanilla ice cream sandwich, and that’s what Chipwich provides. The cookies on this one are fantastic, way better than Toll House [in my humble opinion]. You can get these at the grocery store in packs of three, but I know myself and those would be gone way too quickly, so I usually get them in the single-serve option from Wawa. These seriously make me feel that summer evening golden hour happiness, whether I’m eating them in January or July.
Cost: $2.19 for single serve
Calories: 300

 3. Ben & Jerry’s
Picking a flavor is hard, guys! There are just so many great ones to choose from. Although my all-time favorite B&J’s flavor, “Late Night Snack,” has gone to the graveyard, I’ve been mollified by the recent additions of “Milk & Cookies” and “Chocolate Truffle Shake It” to the lineup. I’m also a big fan of the Non-Dairy flavors, notably “Cherry Garcia” and “Coconut Seven Layer Bar.” Lately, I pride myself on having the self-control to scoop some into a bowl rather than take the whole pint into bed with me—because when that happens, it’s definitely getting finished in one fell swoop. No shame though, it’s delicious.
Cost: $4.50 at my local Food Lion
Calories: about 400 per serving (1/4 of a pint)

 4. Orange Creamsicles
Does anything make you feel like a kid more than dripping popsicle juice all over your hands? Okay, I guess that doesn’t actually happen to me anymore, but these treats still take me back to childhood. I think orange and vanilla are just one of those classic combinations, and these will have my heart forever. I also appreciate a portable dessert like a popsicle or something that I can eat while walking around. Is that weird?
Cost: $0.21 ? That seems wrong, but you can buy a box of twelve for $2.50 at Food Lion so unless my calculator is really doing me dirty I guess these are super cheap!
Calories: 100 for one popsicle

 5. Rita’s Water Ice Gelati
We don’t have Rita’s in Massachusetts, so I experienced it for the first time less than a year ago here in Virginia. For those of you that don’t know, it’s a cute little place with an outdoor ordering window that serves slush [apparently called “water ice” in some places that aren’t Boston] and frozen custard. The gelati option involves layering those two together, which I know sounds weird but is actually delicious. My favorite combo is mango water ice and vanilla custard.
Cost: $4.25
Calories: around 400 for a regular size

 6. Trader Joe’s “Gone Berry Crazy”
This is super specific, but worth the specificity. Trader Joe’s has the ultimate freezer section, and within that the ultimate frozen dessert section, and within that, the ultimate dessert: Gone Berry Crazy. It’s a box full of frozen chunks of dark-chocolate-covered strawberries. And it’s healthy because it’s fruit, right? I don’t know how they do it, but I have never enjoyed chocolate covered fruit more than this particular product. I could easily down a whole box—if you haven’t tried these, you honestly need to immediately. There are Trader Joe’s everywhere. Go. Now.
Cost: $2.29 per box
Calories: 100 per serving (6 pieces)

 7. Dibs
Maybe this is a hot take, but I stand by it. You know you’ve seen those little red tubs at movie theater concession counters, in those gas station ice cream freezers, and everywhere else that sells random niche things. Like the convenience store on my college campus. Dibs are just little tater-tot-sized blobs of vanilla ice cream dipped in chocolate with crispy rice [possibly related to Crunch bars?], but I think they’re so good! Not a lot of frozen desserts give you that snacking pleasure of reaching into a container and grabbing food with your hands, but Dibs definitely do. Would 10/10 recommend—you won’t be sorry!
Cost: $2.50
Calories: 320 per container

 So, that’s the verdict: seven delicious frozen treats, perfect for summer or any time of year, morning or night, literally whenever. Let’s get back to enjoying food!