Self-Care, Best Care
In the name of relaxing, rainy Tuesday afternoons [i.e. the perfect time to curl up in bed and watch The Bachelor], I want to talk about self-care. We hear a lot of self-care rhetoric these days, but what does that concept actually mean? To preface this, let me point out the obvious: self-care can consist of drastically different practices from one person to the next. With that in mind, here are some of my thoughts on what self-care means to me—and I’m excited to hear all of your other suggestions in the comments too!
When I picture self-care, I tend to visualize a fairly typical image: a woman soaking in a bubble bath with her hair pulled up in a messy bun, sporting a face mask and cucumber slices over her eyes, and reading Sylvia Plath. Even as I say this, however, I realize that’s not my personal ideal of self-care at all. If I was going to read in the tub, it would be a good old beachy romance novel [don’t judge! When I’m not reading all the books for my English major, sometimes I just prefer something trashy]. But wait—I don’t even like baths. And honestly, I live in a fairly dated rental house with two male housemates, so I’m not sure any amount of scrubbing could actually make our tub clean enough for a bath. Plus, by the time I did all of that bleaching, would it even be self-care anymore?
My point is that I don’t think anyone completely subscribes to that classic idea of what self-care looks like. In that spirit of individuality, here are my top six things that I love to do when I want to take time for myself or “treat myself,” so to speak [not that self-care should be an unusual treat! It should be your standard for living a healthy, balanced lifestyle—more on this later]:
1. Peel-off face masks. Yes, this is particular, but there’s really nothing like the feeling of ripping whiteheads, blackheads, and other imperfections out of your skin. It’s just so satisfying! Admit it—you can relate. And best of all, it only takes about ten or fifteen minutes to feel like you’ve done something special for yourself, and then you can get on with the day if you’re busy.
2. Watch a show. For this kind of tv-watching, I tend towards sitcoms and reality shows. My personal favorites right now? Friends and The Bachelor. You just can’t beat them! I like to pick shows that don’t take too much mental effort so that it still feels like relaxation and I can also browse Instagram while I’m watching. I can’t help myself! I’m part of that generation.
3. Go to the grocery store. I don’t know why I love grocery stores so much, but I really do. Especially Trader Joe’s. Now that I have my car at school, it’s way too easy to just drive over there and browse. To be fair, it’s not the best option if I’m trying to save money, but treating myself to a fun snack or even just replenishing my weekly groceries in the wholesome atmosphere that is Trader Joe’s reinvigorates me. It feels like I’m completing a task [yay! accomplishment!] and doing something fun at the same time.
4. Write. It’s not for everyone, but for me writing is very relaxing. While getting started can be challenging sometimes, once the words begin flowing out onto the paper, I get a feeling of relief and ease. Whether it’s working on this blog or writing parts of the short story collection that I’m experimenting with, it’s nice to release some of the ideas that bounce around in my head all day and put them into a more concrete form.
5. Fold laundry. If my mom is reading this right now, she definitely thinks that I’m crazy. I know for a fact that she hates folding laundry, but hey, everyone feels that way about one detestable chore [for me, it’s washing the dishes that I’ve let pile up in the sink for a week—sorry to the guys I live with! I’ll do it soon, I promise]. On the other hand, I find folding laundry so rejuvenating. It makes me so happy to come home from classes or practice to a clean room, and obviously having organized clothes makes that feeling even better.
6. Running! How could I leave this off? There’s nothing like the feeling of going for a long run and having lots of time to zone out and just think by myself. Plus, it feels good for both my mind and my body, and gives me a sense of accomplishment to carry me through the rest of the day. I find that running helps me focus and gives my mind a break from stressing over the small things as all the endorphins kick in and I pretty much just daydream about what it’ll feel like to cross the finish line at my half-marathon in March!
Although I’ve listed all these things, self-care is definitely still something that I could stand to work on. I do love these activities, but that doesn’t mean that I necessarily do them regularly. I’ve definitely been known to skip a face mask I’ve been dying to try because I feel rushed to get on with my day. I sometimes guilt myself out of watching a show—even if I’ve done my homework for tomorrow, shouldn’t I start my homework for the next day? On occasion I even put off fun creative writing because there are so many other academic things I should be writing. What I need to teach myself [and what I hope you all take away from this post] is that caring for myself and doing these activities fuels me to do the more challenging things that I don’t always want to do. Self-care is not a treat; it’s a necessity.
If you don’t take time to do the things that your mind and body are begging you to do, if you don’t take time to sit down for a moment and reflect on what you need, you’ll become so bogged down in the responsibilities of everyday life that those things will pile on more and more stress. I understand what some people might be thinking here: but I don’t have time to take a break. But I don’t have time for “self-care.” I’m not saying to drop everything right now and get in the bathtub and completely cease doing homework for the rest of the semester. I’m suggesting finding a balance in your life that allows you to do both kinds of stuff: the fun and the mundane.
Here’s an example of what that might look like for me. Since I knew that I wanted to watch The Bachelor in my free time between class and practice today, I spent more time than usual doing homework yesterday so that I could get a little bit ahead. Without the motivation of carving out time for myself today, I might have been less efficient with my assignments yesterday and let some carry over into this afternoon. It’s also true that it’s not always that easy. Some weeks, I’ll have way too much work to take two hours out of my day for some reality TV. At those times, it’s the small things that matter. I’ll get my favorite yogurt for breakfast so that I have something special for myself in the morning. I’ll throw on a face mask while I do my American Lit reading, or I’ll fold laundry while I watch a documentary for Linguistics. It’s all about that kind of compromise and finding the balance that works for you.
What do you picture when you think of self-care? What does that concept mean to you, and what are your favorite ways to take time for yourself and recharge? Even if it’s not something you normally do, I challenge you to find just thirty minutes this week to spend alone, doing something that makes you happy. Let me know how it goes!
